I will wrap my arms around your….

THROAT AND STRANGLE YOU TO DEATH IF I EVER FIND OUT YOU:

1) Purchased this product in a SERIOUS attempt to show someone you love them

2) Received this product and then put it on as though you truly enjoy it

PEOPLE THIS MADNESS HAS GOT TO STOP – as if SNUGGIES, SLANKETS, and the rest were not bad enough!

What is the focus & attention of my volcanic eruption of IRE, you may ask?

Watch this video & see for yourself…..

I mean come on people – SERIOUSLY?  I am daily reminded at just how extremely STUPID we as Americans can be.  I mean do you understand the implications of this product?  It means that somewhere a group of people sat down and looked at this product and decided – YES – this is EXACTLY what we NEED – YES – this product DOES serve a purpose and YES – Americans WILL SPEND $30 on this ridiculous PIECE OF CRAP!

You will probably need to watch this monstrosity for a 2nd time to truly believe it – and if you do – then follow along with these questions that I asked myself after watching it!  (also considered the 5 levels of loser-ness of the “hug-e-gram”)

1) Did anyone notice that they began the commercial with the woman being slowly bothered by ALWAYS receiving flowers – YET IN THE SAME COMMERCIAL the “bonus” is a set of FREAKIN’ FAKE WOOD FLOWERS!!!

2) How big of a loser would that delivery guy have to be taking that fine product to the front door?

3) How much BIGGER of a loser would you be if as you sit in your office in your nice suit & tie you wrap yourself in the complete warmth and love of 2 FAKE ARMS COVERED IN CHEAP FABRIC MATERIAL?

4) And not quite the FINAL LEVEL OF LOSER-DOM – but how GIGANTIC of a loser are you to actually ORDER THIS THING and expect the person receiving it to truly believe that you meant it SERIOUSLY!

5) That brings us to the HIGHEST LEVEL OF LOSER!  Stage Five – Terror Threat Level RED – which would be…… drum roll please……  wait – for – it …..    YES the absolute, scraping-the-bottom-of-the-barrel-loser that picks up the phone and not only ORDERS this horrendous waste of time, effort & material BUT YES LADIES AND GENTLEMEN actually RECORDS THEIR OWN VOICE on a message of mediocrity & stupidity to PROVE to the “person they love” that they WERE ACTUALLY The one to think this through and place the order.

Now yes – I’ve bought the occasional card from wal-mart – er um Hallmark that you can push the button and record a message but that is a card, with a space to write a personal message, and IT COSTS ABOUT $5 and to some extent was meant to have some humor as a personal touch – BUT COME ON – REALLY – the “HUG-E-GRAM”?????

I guess we really are a society full of morons willing to throw our money away at just about anything!

I know we all had fun giving the occasional snuggie as a funny gift – but please for the love of all that is RIGHT IN THIS WORLD – DO NOT EVER – FOR ANY REASON PURCHASE THIS STUPID PRODUCT – I cry out to you for EVERY PERSON in a 3rd world country who barely has food to eat & a house in which to live – DO NOT THROW YOUR MONEY AWAY ON THIS – if you have $25 to just simply WASTE – drop me a line and I will give you a MUCH GREATER CAUSE to give it to!

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1 Comment

Filed under Comedy, Friday Media, Interesting Videos

One response to “I will wrap my arms around your….

  1. Carrie

    HAHA! I saw that stupid thing on Ellen!

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